Compassion for others is important right now as anger takes over easily

When we do not want to or do not allow ourselves to feel anxiety or fear, for example, anger may be an easier emotion.

“Anger is also highly contagious; we can learn to get angry or absorb the emotion in order to feel included,” says Aino Kohtala, Psychologist and Psychotherapist at Terveystalo.

Anger is a basic human emotion that helps us defend ourselves and express our needs. However, it has its downsides.

“When we are stressed and angry, our rational thinking tends to be put on the back burner. Our thinking may become black and white and we feel the need to release our emotions, even in ways that may not help the situation, despite momentary relief. Because we can’t give Putin a phone call, for example, we may offload our anger onto our loved ones, even if our senses say otherwise.”

Compassion is contagious

On the other side of anger, there is compassion, which is luckily also contagious.

“Compassion is more than a feeling; it means doing something for the benefit of others. Compassion helps us see and identify the distress of others and act accordingly. By helping them, for example. Stress may reduce your sense of empathy and compassion, but on the other hand, actively practicing compassion may reduce stress. So this works both ways.”

Crises make the circle of compassion smaller

We often limit our compassion to people we feel belong to the same group as us in some way, such as our loved ones, acquaintances, residents of the same city or nationals of the same country.

“Such restriction of compassion may partly stem from the perspective of having to be part of a group and defend it for survival. Today, this phenomenon translates to highly straightforward views in crises. Everyone who is not part of our group is not included in our circle of compassion. At worst, the phenomenon can manifest itself as racist comments, thoughts or actions.”

Compassion can be trained like a muscle

Luckily, the circle of compassion can be expanded by training. The first step is to consider whether your compassion tends to be limited.

“Think about whether you are able to feel compassion towards all types of people and nations, even in a crisis. How do you feel about other people when reading news of war? When you encounter a person who thinks differently or comes from different origins, how does it make you feel? War can and should evoke unpleasant emotions, but this is a good time to think if you are able to encounter people as individuals or if their origins or nationality immediately evoke negative feelings.”

An ability to identify your emotions helps you widen your circle of compassion.

“Our compassion always grows when we meet different people, cultures, ideas and attitudes. When we find common ground with another person, see their humanity and genuinely listen to how they think or feel about a situation, our ability to feel and show compassion is strengthened.”

“Luckily, the circle of compassion can be expanded by training. The first step is to consider whether your compassion tends to be limited.”

Why don’t my thoughts of feelings align with my values?

If you feel anxious about your anger or lack of compassion, you can talk to a professional about it.

“Anger, for example, is highly stressful for the body and mind. Your heart rate and breathing get faster, your blood pressure rises, your muscles tense up and your hormone balance is shaken. Our ability to process information or feel compassion is weakened. If we constantly feel angry, we may get ill. That is why it’s important to work on your emotions.”

The key is to learn to identify your emotions and what causes them.

“Is the feeling of anger connected to my experiences or general social and historical discourse? Do I participate in the hate because it is important for me to maintain a sense of community? Is my feeling of anger connected to how I was raised at home? You can slowly start to rebuild your mindset according to your values.”

We will never be able to fully erase anger from our range of emotions or our thinking. What is important is how you let your emotions and thoughts guide your behavior.

“We can never fully control our thoughts and feelings, but we can choose our actions regardless of them. It can be helpful to consider whether an expression of anger in an inappropriate way will help anyone right now. Could I direct my energy towards helping innocent people or volunteering? This can help create a constructive and beneficial channel for your need to react.”